The Challenge of Recognizing Gender Pronouns and Its Impact on Society

Posted on 26 May, 2023 by Marie Lafortune

Have you ever met someone who asked you to call them by certain pronouns that don’t make sense for what you have been taught in school?

That happened to me yesterday!

Yes, I was with a friend, and we were having a conversation about ASD studies, baby food, and what really worried us regarding child development. Then, suddenly, my friend said “Hi” to someone that I can see perfectly portrayed as a well standing female, beautiful, standing with poise, all of that. And I told my friend, "Oh wow! Who’s your new friend? Legitimately asking, right?

She said, "Please do not embarrass me; it’s not a she, it’s a he."

Okay, well, I did not sound "confused", but I sounded "curious". I wanted to know if it was just the “appellation” or if there was a transformation behind the pronoun’s change. Guess what! It is a perfect female who asked friends and family to address her by the “he/him/his” pronoun. Just imagine my face… I'll let you guess!

In recent years, society has become more aware of and accepting of diverse gender identities. As a result, the use of gender-neutral pronouns has gained significant attention. While embracing gender pronouns is a positive step towards inclusivity, it also presents a challenge for individuals who may struggle to recognize and adapt to this evolving linguistic landscape, like me. In this blog, we will explore the difficulty associated with recognizing gender pronouns and how it can impact society as a whole.

Expanding Gender Pronouns

Gender pronouns go beyond the traditional binary pronouns of "he" and "she." Individuals may prefer pronouns such as "they/them," "she/her," "he/his," or others that align with their gender identity. The purpose of using gender pronouns is to respect and acknowledge each person's self-identified gender, creating a more inclusive environment.

Challenges in Recognizing Gender Pronouns

1. Linguistic Unfamiliarity: Gender-neutral pronouns may be unfamiliar to many people due to their recent emergence. Individuals who are accustomed to using binary pronouns may find it challenging to adapt to new language conventions. It takes time and effort to become comfortable with incorporating gender-neutral pronouns into everyday speech and writing.

2. Pronoun Ambiguity: Some gender-neutral pronouns, such as "they/them," can be confusing when used in a singular context. This ambiguity can lead to uncertainty and difficulty in correctly addressing individuals without making assumptions about their gender.

3. Memory and Recall: Recognizing and remembering someone's preferred gender pronouns can be a mental exercise, especially when interacting with multiple individuals who use different pronouns. It requires active listening, attentiveness, and a conscious effort to recall and use the appropriate pronouns in conversations.

4. Fear of Offense: Misgendering someone by using incorrect pronouns can cause emotional distress and invalidate their identity. This fear of causing offense can create anxiety and hesitation, making it even more challenging to adapt to the use of gender pronouns.

Impact on Society

1. Inclusive Environment: Recognizing and using gender pronouns contributes to creating an inclusive society where people feel valued and respected. By acknowledging individuals' gender identities, we foster an environment that is supportive, accepting, and celebrates diversity.

2. Psychological Well-being: Validating someone's gender identity by using their preferred pronouns has a positive impact on their psychological well-being. It helps reduce feelings of marginalization, dysphoria, and emotional distress, allowing individuals to feel more comfortable and confident in their authentic selves.

3. Social Progress and Acceptance: Embracing gender-neutral pronouns reflects societal progress and acceptance of gender diversity. It sends a message that everyone's identity is valid, irrespective of societal norms or expectations. By adapting to gender pronouns, we challenge and dismantle gender stereotypes, promoting a more inclusive society.

4. Workplace and Educational Inclusion: Incorporating gender pronouns in workplaces and educational institutions creates environments that value diversity and inclusion. It helps organizations and institutions establish policies and practices that respect individuals' identities and promote equality.

While recognizing gender pronouns can be a challenge, it is an essential step toward fostering inclusivity and acceptance in society. It might be difficult at first when using gender identity for the first time. But if you have a close friend who wants to be addressed by a different pronoun than what they were assigned at birth, let it be and be wise enough to accommodate your language accordingly.

When we embrace our differences in gender diversity by adapting to evolving language conventions, we create a more supportive environment for everyone. As individuals, we can strive to educate ourselves, practice active listening, and respect others' gender identities. Together, we can build a more inclusive world where everyone feels seen, valued, and respected.